Love For Sale – Is Sex Just Another Currency?
Would you have sex for money? What about for a place to stay? What about if you were sort-of attracted to the person and they had something you really needed? Like food.
Trading sex for resources is, basically, prostitution. And yet most of us do it all the time, even in committed relationships. We trade sex for resources like safety and security, or we offer resources like nice dinners and Louis Vuitton handbags in exchange for sex. Pure physical attraction between two people is often pretty far down the list of reasons to have sex, according to one University of Michigan study, and a bestselling book called Why Women Have Sex.
This makes perfect sense to prostitute Alison.* “I heard somewhere that a guy isn’t just paying me to have sex… He’s paying me to leave.”
The exchange of money for no-strings sex is the most obvious example of prostitution, but what about day-to-day resources, like a place to live? In the middle of the 2008 housing boom in Paris, vacant rooms were being advertised as contre services. That means there’s no rent to pay, but there is an exchange – for sex. Would you do it? With rent prices going through the roof (no pun intended), there is a serious choice to be made between homelessness and less-than-ideal ways to pay the rent.
Exchanging sex for a place to live when there are very few options is an extreme case. But apparently humans are hard-wired to exchange sex for resources, even without dire circumstances forcing the choice. A Michigan University study found that around 1 in 4 students would get involved in sex-for-resources, even if they didn’t need them… as long as the resource was right. Items traded included tickets to the big game, tutoring, even having laundry washed. What is the most interesting part? There were plenty of men offering sex, and plenty of women offering resources – it’s not always about the guy buying dinner.
Putting moral outrage aside, exchanging sex for resources is pretty common, and not just with humans. Scientists call it Nuptial Gifting: A fancy way of saying that whoever can offer the best security, comfort, or prettiest nest is likely to get the prize.
So why isn’t this more common – or at least more talked about? It all comes down to morals, and often religion. Sex is seen as the last great gate-keeper of our morality, women’s morality in particular. Basically, the old ‘only have sex to make babies with a spouse’ hangover is still with us. Until that shifts, trading a little romp for a good meal and a cute outfit will need to stay on the down-low.
You don’t need to go to bed with anyone to rent Apartments in Barcelona, you only need to click a couple of times and enter some details.
*Name changed
